Ethical Treatment of Animals) protesting the Chicken Dance at Talladega. Boy you know they’re going to get some real results from that. Just like when His Royal Highness, the Emperor of All Things NA$CAR, said the Confederate flag isn’t the flag he supports. Fans who could’ve cared less about the Confederate flag went out and bought them and flew them in their camping spots as a sign of defiance to Faux King Brian. You can bet that if any NA$CAR fans heard about PETA’s protest (as I sit here eating a KFC 3 piece meal), they’ll be off to the nearest KFC just to spite PETA. In my case, I get a craving for KFC once or twice a year, which is OK since it doesn’t exactly fit in with my low cholesterol diet. It’s in moderation. Just like my coffee intake.
I’m happy to see Cale Yarborough being added to the Darlington Legends Walk. He gave a lot of fans a lot of fond memories and delivered a lot of excitement to those who saw him race. He also gave a nickname to another driver who has since become a cartoon parody of himself and so I have aptly named him Jabber Jaws.
With Brett Favre looking to come out of retirement yet again and play for the Vikings, you have to wonder if maybe some of the Packers fans are starting to feel the same way about him as some NA$CAR fans feel about Mark Martin, especially since he was supposed to retire how many years ago and plans to drive yet another full season next year.
Jimmy Spencer wrote a decent piece about getting back to the sport’s roots and the Southern 500. This is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to getting back to the roots of the sport. What was once family run or independent team operation has become a lot like the large corporations on Wall Street. Instead of answering to the owner, who in most cases was also the driver, they have to answer to their sponsors, investors, manufacturers, Faux King Brian, and the marketing people. Instead of having a driver who can drive the team owner needs to have someone who’s a pretty face and can be a pitchman for advertisements. Driving skill isn’t a necessity. When a driver’s ability to drive a car was what made him popular with fans, it’s now driven by marketing and hype. The cars use to be bought off the showroom floor and turned into race cars. Now, they’re bought as a kit from the sanctioning body, assembled, and have no resemblance at all to the street counterpart except for the light and grill decals. The drivers use to race 40-60 races a year, sometimes racing 3-4 days/nights a week and did it without complaining. Nowadays, it’s a stretch for the drivers to race 38 races a year and we hear complaints about the schedule being too long. The race schedule use to take the teams to dirt and paved tracks all across the country with each track being unique with their own little quirks. Nowadays, if a driver wants to run on dirt, he does it on his own dime. NA$CAR sacrificed tracks like North Wilkesboro, Pikes Peak, and the Rock for cookie cutter tracks which are all “sanitized for your protection”. Racing action use to be the pitch to draw crowds to a track. Now the advertising shows wrecks or racing in the glory days to try to get folks to part with their hard earned cash because the racing action isn’t what it use to be. Being proud of its’ Southern roots use to be something the sanctioning body was proud of. Now Faux King Brian tries to deny it even existed. If they really wanted to get back to the roots, let’s get back to running stock cars or something that at least resembles what’s on the streets. Let’s bring back some of these unique tracks that have been replaced by the cookie cutters and place them as tracks in the Chase for the Chumps. Dump the Top 35 rule. Go back to the fastest 43 race on race day. Let’s show all 43 cars on TV and not just 12 of them unless there’s a wreck. Let the team owners hire drivers for their driving skills and not just because they have a pretty face. And quit trying to deny the Southern roots of the sport. If it wasn’t for all those Southerners who faithfully attended the races in the early days, the sport wouldn’t have grown to what it is today. And finally, quit revising the sport’s history to suit the “politically correct” climate. The Frances made some huge mistakes in the old days and fessing up to it shouldn’t be that painful. Fans have known and talked about some of the things that went on back then for years. So just come clean about it and move on. Maybe then, folks might “return to the fold”.
There’s a new influx of writers showing up on the internet, which I don’t have a problem with. The more the merrier. However, it can be a buyer beware situation of sorts. You can tell some of these new folks are new. They’re happily drinking Faux King Brian’s Kool Aid and think everything is all rosy in the world of Faux King Brian. For those of us fans who have been around the block a time or two, we know better. As one of our faithful readers e-mailed me, “Just because they have a computer, internet access, and have watched NA$CAR for a year or two doesn’t make them an expert”. I still consider myself to be new when it comes to writing about NA$CAR and don’t claim to be an expert. I do have some experience to fall back on having been in and around the racing business and have some great folks who e-mail me from time to time who really are experts, which does help out. Plus having some former racing greats and championship crew chiefs as friends helps out too. As another fan of ours wrote, “I don’t know why I keep reading these hacks”. I’m sure David Poole would weigh in with a few comments of his own about the folks covering the sport nowadays if he weren’t busy writing about the racing “upstairs”.
Benny Parsons Rendezvous Ridge is celebrating Benny’s wins at Charlotte Motor Speedway on May 22nd from 5pm to 9 pm. Food and drinks will be provided. Wine will be available to purchase. No coolers allowed (Sorry folks). Call 336-973-7375 for more information and to RSVP. And no, I’m not getting anything for mentioning that. Terri Parson’s is a great gal and I’m just trying to help her out.
I saw the Star Trek paint scheme that Stremme will have and I thought that maybe the France family needs to do something ala Star Trek and boldly go where no man has gone before. Put somebody from outside the family in charge of NA$CAR and maybe then they can turn things around. And yes, I’m available if the price is right. But only after you try AJ Foyt, Mario Andretti, Dan Gurney, and The King to run it.
The rumor that won’t die about Danica and NA$CAR keeps going round and round. Let’s face it folks. She’s not coming. As I’ve said before, she doesn’t like the length of the season. Besides, we’ve already got a male version of her in the Cup Series and one of that one is more than enough.
Something that seems to have slipped by the card carrying media members unnoticed but spotted by one of our readers has to do with Budweiser’s parent company InBev.
InBev, the parent company of Budweiser, announced Wednesday that they are going to take up to 120 days to pay its bills. Aside from the bind it puts RPM in (cash flow is king), look what it does to InBev's ad agency that is making the media buys but now won't be reimbursed for 120 days. Case in point: Have you seen many Chrysler commercials lately? BBDO, Chrysler's ad agency and second largest unsecured creditor, is owed over $58 million in reimbursements for media advertising. It's gotten to the point that Chrysler has moved from national buys to doing spot ads on the local level. Wait it get better. Local networks are beginning to demand payment up front.
The economic implications to NA$CAR in general and RPM could be major. Do you really think Faux King Brian is going to sit idly on his throne (the one that flushes) and wait for all those shiny, new pennies to roll into the Royal Bank Vault for 120 days? Are the networks going to wait 120 days to get paid for their commercials and plugs? Are RPM’s parts distributors going to wait 120 days? Is Badyear going to wait 120 days for RPM to get paid? I don’t think so. So RPM may have to “rob Peter to pay Paul” when it comes to keeping RPM and Kasey Kahne’s car on the track. Plus they may have to come up with another sponsor who can actually pay on time to keep Bud on the car. Be sure to check out some of the comments about this move in the linked articles.
By now everyone’s heard about Mark Martin postponing his retirement for yet another year. So this leaves Brad Keselowski hanging in limbo as far as a Cup ride goes. Maybe. Another year in the Busch Series isn’t going to hurt him. If anything, he’ll be better off for it. Look at what’s happened with Joey Logano. He was moved up way too
early. But that aside, there could be a way Brad
could move up providing Rick Hendrick and/or
Jr. cough up some cash. And that’s by putting
him in one of the Hendrick satellite teams in the
garage area. That would mean either Phoenix
Racing or Stewart-Haas. Brad’s already won for
Phoenix, so that would be a logical place for
him to go. With Hendrick providing more
support, James Finch could branch out into a
bigger operation. By sending him to
Stewart-Hass, he’d be with a team that’s doing
better than average for a freshly “minted” team.
While Smoke and Newman haven’t gotten to
Victory Lane, the equipment is good enough to
get them there and should do the same for
Brad. However, will it actually happen? Doubtful, very doubtful. With the economy being what it is, unless Jr. takes his JR Motorsports team to the Cup level, Brad’s going to spend at least another year in the Busch leagues. And that’s providing Mark Martin doesn’t extend his contract for yet another year.
With this weekend being Mother’s Day weekend, I want to wish all the mothers out there a very happy Mother’s Day. And to all the military spouses with their other half overseas protecting our freedom, a very special thanks for the sacrifice you and your families are making.
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Motherhood, Apple Pie, and John Wayne
Mad Mikie
Curmudgeon at Large
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